Sunday, October 30, 2005 @ 10/30/2005 11:31:00 AM
| The longest Blog |
I was inspired to blog abt my taxi experiences.
Taxi Driver 1:
The "let me tell u a joke" man
Rite this old man, I cant stand it. Got up the cab outside work place to the nearest MRT station - Bedok. Let me include some info so that u can gauge the journey betwn these 2 places. A normal fare is like $3 including the $2.40. So effectively its a 60cents journey that takes abt 5 mins? He started to pour all the jokes he know. Can you imagine? 6 jokes in 5 mins??
I almost wanna choke on my laughter. Not by his jokes. But by his enthusiasm of sharing his jokes which are ... erm... not funny. Ppl who know me would noe. When i say its Not Funny, its NOT FUNNY! The jokes were like those "do you noe that aft the 5C that women crave for, now ther's a 6th C..... do you noe what the 5K-s stand for? it means Kiasu, Kiasi...." blah blah blah
You get the idea.
I mean even if it were to be funny enough for me to like give a sweet smile, or like a girly giggle, can u jus give me time to react?!?!
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Taxi Driver 2:
The oldest driver (i've ever seen) with the dirtiest car
Forgot wher i took the cab. Only remembered being under the freaging hot sun. So happy to see this cab turning out of the carpark. Of cos i flagged it down.
**[ There are 2 problems with me and taxis:
1. when im waiting for one, none will appear. When one appears, it somehow will make the others appear behind it, forming a long queue. Blardy sheeet.
2. when im waiting for a cab, none will appear. When im at the bus stop, comtemplating abt whether i should save money and take a bus instead of splurgin on cabs, plenty of cabs will drive past the bus stop. Then the next thing i noe - i succumb to the evil-est temptation. ] **
Back to the story.
Then of cos the female lead happily hopped onto the cab. To her horror, the driver was a very very old man, white hair. Rite she's not being bad lah. But in her truthful opinion, ppl of this age should not be driving, or at least should not be drivin a taxi. Very soon, you will understand why... -
"Uncle, Serangoon Ave 2."
"Huh? Serangoon Road ar?"
"No. Serangn Ave 2!"
"Huh? Serangn North ar?"
"No!! SERANGN AVE 2!!"
"Ohh... Serangn ave 2"
Soon aft he drove off... " Xiao Mei, Upper Serangn aR?"
"!!!?!?!?!? #$*^#@&^%$%(*&@*#%^(#)%*&*@#^%%"
*pengz*
Then finally we broke the communication barrier. Though half the time i was still wondering wher in the end i will end up at. Then i started to realise that i might jus puke to death aft the journey. The car was so dam dirty. With dust n litter on the floor, the squeaky driver seats was almost gonna fall off their rusty stands. Then to my horror (for the 2nd time), i saw a big ant on my bag! I couldnt haf brought it out frm home. And another one at the door jus next to me!
Fine. you say im a cleanliness freak. BIG Ants only wad... ok lor.
Then the way he drive.... OMG.. that's abt the only time i thanked god that i bought insurance. Got horned so many times on the way. He tried to overtake or change lanes without even checking blind spots properly. Then...... half way through the journey.... he turned his whole head back and asked "Serangoon Ave 2 hor?" while the car was still in motion!
ARghghghhg... this actually put me off from the company's cab for quite some time. Whenever i see this company's cab, i would jus wait for the next one.
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I hope i dun get into trouble wif cab companies aft this like what the newpaper wrote abt this other blogger on handicap toilets. haha... of cos i wont. I haf no endorsement from whatsoever, and im sure my readers are those on my "bloggerist" list only.
I would like to quote the blogger stated in the abve paragraph. haha... i like her way of imagining herself killin someone..
" If I don't have a satay stick I will stab him with a ... forget it. I will randomly ask a menstruating girl around to gimme her used pad so I can slap him with it, then stuff it into his big mouth, coz it is so full of rubbish anyway."
hahahahaha... that's so dam funny..
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I think i jus blogged the longest blog ever since i started bloggin.
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