Tuesday, June 22, 2004 @ 6/22/2004 02:58:00 AM
| BoreD |
It's so sickening to be visiting the same places again and again every weekend. But he thinks its fine. Right. Goin to the same places, looking at the same things, no movies, no pool, no nothing. Jus window shop. Sometimes i really jus feel like stayin at home. Dun even haf the urge to meet up. Maybe the feeling is not dat strong anymore... I dun know..
How i wish he can surprise me wif little gifts now and then. Or jus appear unexpectedly to give me pleasant surprises. I've told him how and where to surprise me but they nv happen. Reality is always different from my expectations. I admit, im not feeling as strongly towards the relationship as before..
I still dislike the things he do, still hates the fact that he puts his interest in the first place, still cant stand the way he views certain things.. but now i cant be bothered. I used to nag, voice out my displeasure in many ways. Through communicating, sms, emails, nothing works. Dun even think about it. He said that i was irritating, always thinking of things to quarrel. But i felt that they were the essential things to sort out and move on. I believe that we should settle some disagreements and problems between us, he chose to avoid them. Fine.. I shall keep my mouth shut. Is this good or bad?
There was a point when i had this feeling too, about a yr ago. I felt that i should jus shut up but my voice returned. Now the same feeling is coming back. I tried to find possible reasons... maybe we haf been together for too long. He doesnt see the need to be as loving as he used to be. It has only been 3yrs. If the flame only last for this long, what about the future?
He wont read this. But even if he does, it wont make a difference anyway.
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